kNOw retreat, kNOw surrender…

Decided to steal that title from KGKL. :)

But this vacation has turned into a personal retreat, to get away from the comforts of home; although home has felt uneasy and uncomfortable in the past few days and weeks.  I have never felt so humbled and ‘naked’ in my life.  With nothing to hold onto and nothing to brace my fall with..I am forced to retreat, I am forced to surrender.  Far too long have I placed my identity in my works and my relationships.  Far too long have I pushed away God and placed exterior things to take His place.  Idol Worship.  It’s easy to say, “that will NEVER be me!” but in reality..it’s EASIER to say: “How was I so stupid?!”  

The key to surrender and repentance: it’s not about us!  It’s all about the grace and sovereignty of God!  Turning away from our sinful nature and running towards God.  I love how Hillsong wrote Forever Reign: 

“Oh I’m running to Your arms

I’m running to Your arms

The riches of Your love will always be enough”

When we turn to Him, that unfailing, amazing love is all that we need and should want.  But our flesh will look towards temporal satisfaction to fill that void that we think God can’t fill, especially when we are insecure about it.  

This season will be long and hard..and I know that there will be times that I want to quit, throw in the towel and think it’s not worth it.  This feeling hurts..but like it’s sung: the riches of Your love will always be enough!  The head knowledge is not enough, it’s not gonna suffice and not gonna be able to keep me grounded in God.  

HEART

That’s what it’ll take to be enough, for it to suffice, and to help keep me grounded in God.  So for the next two weeks, closing out this month of June..I WILL retreat, I WILL surrender..because God is all I have and all I really need.  Everything else is an addition, it’s a blessing from God in response to our authentic, real, no strings attached, unconditional love.  

Peace out Hawaii..hello Jesus!!!