Mabuhay!
For those of you who don’t know what that is, it’s the Philippines version of “aloha”. The past two weeks for me were refreshing and encouraging. Being back in the motherland and the place I was born, it felt great. Being able to see family members I have not seen in 9 years exceeded my expectations. But not only was that the highlight, but not having to worry about the stresses of school, work, ministry was, honestly speaking, awesome! It really was a vacation time; but initially i was not looking forward to it. Already having been gone for two weeks in Thailand was quite enough but the thought of leaving and being gone again for another two weeks was too much. But I knew that it was something for me to do in honor of my cousin getting married and his wanting for me to be a part of his life-changing moment. And so I went to the Philippines with the purpose of only being in the wedding. I seen no other forms of personal satisfaction or desire than to satisfy my cousins needs during my trip.
But things changed when I was up there. Seeing some cousins meet us at the airport and them sleeping over at the hotel for the two nights we were in Manila before hitting up the province changed my mindset and got me thinking how much I’ve missed them so much. It wasn’t just the thought of drinking God’s heavenly drink, “royal tru orange”, or chow king’s halo-halo, but being with family who really take family to a different level. They may not have much, materially or financially, but they cherish everything about their loved ones. It got me thinking how much I’d love for THAT feeling of family to be here in Hawaii with my immediate family. It truly felt better up there than here quite honestly. Along with that close family feeling, not having to worry about so many things..it felt like heaven. Just like the lyrics in hillsongs’ new song, “You Hold Me Now”:
No weeping No hurt or pain No suffering You hold me now, you hold me now No darkness No sick or lame No hiding You hold me now, you hold me now!
By the end of the trip, I really didn’t wanna come home. Although I told some people up there I couldn’t wait to come home, DEEP inside, I wanted to stay back. But I knew that wasn’t gonna happen, obviously my home is Hawaii and I can’t leave the things I’ve worked for behind. And of course, I know it’s not on God’s plan because I have nothing to offer up there that would be in line with my destiny; at least not yet. But before I can even think of that, I first must be prepared and train. The time will come when I will minister and outreach to my family in the Philippines. God knows the desires of my heart and it would be selfish for me to just move up there because I didn’t wanna stress or worry and deceiving if I were to make the excuse of wanting to reach out. Yes I want to do that but not at this time. God’s plan for me is to finish school and learn more before being sent.
Acts 1:8 “You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you..be my witnesses..to the ends of the earth”. I need to receive before leaving and know what is ahead of me. I love my family in the Philippines, I love the Philippines, I want to travel. And I’m God’s time, that dream and desire will come to past. It may have felt like heaven, but I’m certainly not ready to leave..yet. ;)
God taught me two things while being in the Philippines, cherish family even more and to be ready for His calling in our lives. He knows us, what we are capable of and our lives, so why should we take it into our hands???
-Francis
